The Pygmalion Project: The Teacher

excerpted from The Pygmalion Project: The Idealist, by Dr. Stephen Montgomery 

Copyright © 1989 Stephen Montgomery

The Idealist most committed to guiding others through the doors of life, or along the pathways of learning and understanding, is the type that Keirsey has named the Teacher (Myers's "ENFJ").

Teachers are natural facilitators in all their relationships, encouraging those around them, urging their personal growth, and taking charge of others (particularly of groups) with an extraordinary enthusiasm and confidence.  Indeed, Teachers are so expressive and charismatic in their leadership -- in a word, so inspiring -- that they seem in some ways less coercive than the other Idealists.  Keirsey says that, though Teachers are both expressive and role-directive, they manage to "command without seeming to do so,"  not by means of explicit orders, nor through saintly patience, romantic longing, or mute withdrawal, but by kindling in their students and colleagues their own passion for self-exploration and development.  Teachers are masters of the art of positive expectation (or "front-loading"), and they communicate their belief in the evolution of the "self" with such a glow of promise that quite often, as Keirsey tells us, their optimism "induces action" in others, and the "desire to live up to [their] expectations."

Teachers bring all this infectious energy to their intimate relationships as well, and they make passionate and delightfully creative companions.  However, at such close range the intensity of their wishes for their loved ones can create interpersonal conflict.  Teachers can overwhelm their loved ones with their exuberance, and with their Pygmalion presumption that everyone wants to be helped along the path of self-discovery.  Then, when their loved ones either resist their pressure or fail to meet their idealistic expectations, Teachers can feel frustrated, disillusioned, or even betrayed by the persons they care most about.
 

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